- All but one of Chicago's beaches were under swim bans today after lifeguards determined they could not keep swimmers safe because fog was limiting visibility.
The bans were posted just before noon and will be lifted when the fog burns off, according to Jessica Maxey-Faulkner, a spokeswoman for the Chicago Park District. Check the district's online beach report for updates.
At first, the Park District said only North Avenue and Oak Street beaches were closed because of fog. But at about 2:25 p.m., the ban was extended to all city beaches. As of about 6 p.m., all the beaches had swim bans except for the 12th Street Beach.
Reports from one of the beaches tell of a sulfurous stench, not unlike that associated with satanic worship, which would actually explain quite a bit of Rahm's deal making abilities.